It's just not etiquette
December 2007

The art of gifting

Damned if you do, and damned if you don't. Never a truer word has been spoken.

Picture this, first birthday together in the new romance and the one you love has presented you with a watch, but aghast it is not your style and you truly believe that his mind must have been on someone else when the thought was put into the purchase.

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So what do you do?

1. Pretend that you love it and wear it even though do not like it.
   
   
2. Tell him that you love how he makes you feel so special with the care he puts into choosing your gifts, but whilst it is lovely it is not your style and perhaps we should go and choose another one together.
   
   
3. Tell him it gives you an allergic reaction and you cannot wear it and there for it sits alone in your drawer and you have no watch to speak of.

Guess what I did?

Yes, you got it, I have no watch !

As we approach the festive season I thought it might be wise to clue us up on how we should behave when it comes to giving and receiving , not only at Christmas time at anytime throughout the year!

WHEN YOU GIVE:

1. Be sure of the true purpose of the gift. Beyond saying the gift is for a particular holiday or occasion, think through how well this gift will express your feelings for this person. To figure this out, ask yourself: How much do I really care about this person? How much time, energy, and money am I willing to spend to select just the right gift for him or her? Let the answers guide you throughout this process.
   
   
2. Do your homework about the receiver. Be observant about his or her favourite items, things he or she might need, or things that would be a meaningful expression of your relationship. Try to remember comments about favourite colours, foods, or beverages. As needed, ask someone else who knows the person, explaining that the purpose of your inquiry is to help learn something that will help you select a special gift. I think most people are willing to help with ideas.
   
   
3. Be sensitive to personal and cultural differences. With such a diverse population in our society, it is important to learn something about a person's ethnic, religious, and cultural practices along with their personal likes and dislikes, before you present a gift. Take time to learn what's appropriate and what's not in different communities to gain insights on what a person would or would not appreciate as a gift. For example, giving a bottle of wine to someone who does not drink alcohol could make the receiver less than overjoyed with your gift.
   
   
4. Know when corporate logos are appropriate. Some times a gift with a company logo cheapens its appearance. The best gifts are those without any company logos or promotion on it, especially when given as special thank-you gift. Logo gifts are fine as small tokens and remembrances for meetings held, not generally as the sincerest form of a thank you gift.
   
   
5. Present your gift with style. The best way to present a gift is always beautifully wrapped and in person. And when you do, present your gift held with both your hands as though you are holding it on a silver platter. This ritual is adopted from Asian culture to show the utmost respect and care. In business situations, when sending the gift by messenger or mail, include your business card with the gift, along with a handwritten note on personal note card or stationary.

WHEN YOU RECEIVE:

1. Show your appreciation when receiving a gift in person. Always put a smile on your face as a gift is being presented. Receive the gift with both hands (again an influence from the Asian culture). Say thank you along with a brief expression of appreciation.
   
   
2. Let the giver know as soon as possible when a gift has arrived. Make every effort to let the sender know you received a gift sent by mail or messenger (email, fax, or telephone call is fine). Then follow it up by sending the proper thank you note as soon as possible.
   
   
3. Be sensitive to opening a gift in front of others. Australian's typically open gifts as soon as it is received, even in front of an audience and other groups of people. Know that in many countries it is not customary or appropriate to open gifts in front of other people. They are kept to be opened alone. When receiving house gifts, special guest and speaker gifts, be sensitive as to whether you will or will not be encouraged and expected to open it right away.
   
   
4. Know the bottom line. Always, always hand write a thank you note for every gift you receive, no matter what - regardless of whether you like the gift or not, even if you plan to exchange the gift or give it away. Simply said: Sending a thank you note is the right thing to do.

Happy Practicing!

Jodie Bache-Mclean Director June Dally-Watkins Education & Training Australia Dallysmodels Management p 07 3221 1183 f  07 3221 3943 w www.jdw.com.au